If I had to pick one of my most troubling outcomes from my brain injury it would definitely be my new stress levels. There are many contributing factors related to why I so often feel stressed. Developing good tools for dealing with my stressful moments is still a work in progress. Along my journey I’ve found some helpful approaches within the Taoist principles. You may laugh, but my first introduction to this philosophy of life was in a wonderful little book called “The Tao of Pooh” by Benjamin Hoff.
What I’m Hoping to Change
Since my brain injury, I’m more susceptible to stress and increasingly prone to overthinking any already stressful situation. Perhaps it’s fueled by this new sense of things being so far beyond my control. Some days I feel rather like a bit of flotsam being tossed and dragged about in an ocean full of undercurrents and riptides. The feeling of helplessness that accompanies this thinking sometimes makes the idea of just spending the day in bed actually look like an attractive option.
My symptoms are evidenced physically as well as mentally and emotionally. High stress triggers my ocular migraines a few times a month now, whereas before my injury I’d get these a handful of times in a year. I also see stress triggered cold sores that try to pop up way too often. Then there’s the other symptoms: poor sleep, stress eating, and general anxiety throughout my days.
The Concept of Wu Wei
This is a central concept of Taoism. Wu wei can be translated as “effortless action” and in essence describes working within the natural flow and not trying to force change. The central text on Taoism, the Tao Te Ching, uses water as an example when describing the concept of wu wei. Water is soft and flexible, adapting to its surroundings – yet it is able to overcome the obstacles it encounters. Water doesn’t break the rocks or push them out of the way; it flows around and over them, gently finding its way along a natural path.
Following this principle of “strategic inaction” means learning not to force action and becoming comfortable with the idea of doing less to accomplish more. The result is that when we do act, our actions are more natural and energetic – producing better results. There is so much more to this concept than I can include here without writing a book of my own; I strongly encourage you to look into this philosophy on your own, and I’ve added some helpful references at the end of this post.
The Impact of Wu Wei on My Anxiety
Employing wu wei in my life means that I see obstacles a little differently now. I don’t have to fix everything. I can work with things just as they are and still accomplish my goal. Here’s an example… when I’m experiencing anxiety, thoughts enter my mind that wouldn’t normally occur to me. For example, I just received a work email informing me that I’ve inherited a set of tasks completely outside my realm of experience and expertise. All too quickly an uninvited “job security” alert pops into my head; a series of questions start forming:
- Will I be able to adapt to the new needs of the business?
- Can I continue to meet the ever-changing requirements for my role?
Now it propagates and branches in new directions…
- Did I present myself well at that last meeting?
- Am I behind on any deliverables right now?
- Should I go reread that last email?
- Etc. …
As you can see, what started as a broad and unspecific concern quickly devolves into a series of nit‑picking questions that have no real value and only serve to increase my anxiety. At this point, my mind is accelerating down a road of no easy return. Where is my stillness? It’s been replaced by anxiety about things that will most likely never even happen. What a complete waste of my time and energy.
Adopting a Wu Wei Lifestyle
Putting this into practice was enough of a challenge for me, and now that I’m trying to put it into words, I’m finding myself coming up short. Here’s how I best understand it:
Things that are truly beyond my control are, well, beyond my control. Any amount of worry, concern, or effort to control these things adds up to nothing more than wasted time and energy – time and energy that I might have spent affecting the things that I do have the ability to change. I can’t control whether that bill collector will accept the payment plan I’ve proposed. I can, however, choose either to do something uplifting such as taking a walk in the forest, working on my latest painting, or starting my next blog post rather than sitting and worrying about something I can’t change.
With my new responsibilities at work, I can choose to spend time worrying that I may not be able to keep up, or I can continue to take each day as it comes and do the things I’m able to do. I can identify existing resources to leverage within the business to work with and build teams to accomplish what’s being asked of me. Here’s a simple way I can accomplish more by doing less… working within the natural flow instead of trying to force change.
In essence, wu wei is all about overcoming our mind’s need to control our environment and the things that impact us, accepting what is and responding instead of reacting. It can feel counterintuitive to let go of our illusion of control until you come to terms with the understanding that control really is just an illusion, for the most part. You can control your own actions and choose to respond rather than react to any given situation, but most things in life don’t check with us before they manifest.
Control is an Illusion
You do a great job at work, your coworkers think you’re the greatest, and your manager has determined you should get a raise – seemingly from nowhere, budget cuts result in your layoff notice. What can you control? Whether you react or respond, how you choose to feel about it all, whether you choose to worry yourself into inaction or take the next step life presents you with. Control is an illusion.
You’ve spent years creating your garden space; it’s lush and bountiful every year. This year, heavy rains caused the river to swell and the sand bags you laid didn’t prevent the flood from reaching your garden space. What can you control? Again, first and foremost, whether you react, or you respond – and again, control is an illusion.
I could list any number of scenarios to illustrate the fact that control is always an illusion with the singular exception that you are in control of your own choices. You can choose to react or to respond. You can choose to chase or to flow. You can choose to act or not to act. This is the limit of our control.
Let Go
We have no true control of what life brings. Every moment spent worrying over events we can’t control is a moment of our life in which we didn’t find peace or joy, and those moments are then just a memory. Anything that has already happened can not be changed, no matter how much of our day is wasted ruminating on how we might have made things work out differently.
Let go. Let go of everything but that which is within your control. You can choose to focus on feelings of peace and contentment, or you can choose to worry and fret. You can choose to worry about how you’ll pay for that new roof, or like me, you can set a goal and create a reasonable plan to make it happen by the end of summer and in the interim, keep a bucket under those leaky spots when it rains.
In Closing
Taoists follow a practice of appreciating, learning from and working with the experiences that life brings us.(1) Letting go and choosing strategic inaction doesn’t mean not doing what needs done, it means following the flow of life to recognize what you can change and accepting the things you can’t. This doesn’t give you a perfect set of circumstances and it doesn’t fix everything in your life that feels out of balance; it does help you to move more naturally, flowing around obstacles and drifting effortlessly into the smooth flowing current of this river of life.
And here I experience something common with brain injury survivors. I set out at the beginning to introduce the concept of Taoism and the flow took me in a bit of an unexpected direction. The result may not be exactly what I initially intended, but I believe this message has strong value. Perhaps the topic of Taoism was too much for this post, but wu wei fits nicely. What a perfect example of accomplishing more by letting go of the illusion of control and flowing around the obstacles to be carried along by the ebbs and flows of life.
When what you try stop trying to control what’s beyond your ability to control, each day becomes so much simpler. Since my brain injury, I don’t deal well with stress. Wu wei works well for me and helps to reduce my stress levels. Maybe it can make a difference for you. For a simple and lighthearted introduction to Taoism and the Pooh Way (er, I mean wu wei), I highly recommend “The Tao of Pooh” by Benjamin Hoff.
References
- Archer, M. (2007). The Tao of Pooh—a
philosophy that changed my practice
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC478227/ - Rory Mackay,
Wu Wei: 4 Simple Steps to Mastering the Art of Actionless Action
http://www.unbrokenself.com/wu-wei/ - Bruce Frantzis , Effortlessness and Taoist
Meditation: Discovering the Joy Inside Yourself
https://www.energyarts.com/wu-wei-meditation/ - Harry J. Stead, The Principle Of Wu Wei And
How It Can Improve Your Life
https://medium.com/personal-growth/the-principle-of-wu-wei-and-how-it-can-improve-your-life-d6ce45d623b9 - Wu Wei and Water – Their Shared Qualities
https://www.webpages.uidaho.edu/~rfrey/116wuweiwater.htm
Be the first to comment